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Overview
5 Financial Red Flags in Relationships
In a relationship, financial red flags can be a signal of tough times. Addressing a financial red flag may sound scary, but it can be a positive experience if both parties are willing to work on it. Here are 5 financial red flags to watch out for when you’re in a relationship.
- Refusing to talk about money
While asking for bank statements on the first date might be inappropriate, discussing money matters with someone you genuinely care about is not unreasonable. Planning a future together means communicating openly and being on the same page, financially and otherwise. Refusing to talk about money might indicate a serious problem, such as hidden debts or not being ready for a committed relationship. - Frequent overspending
It’s natural to want to impress a potential partner, and gifts or outings are a common way to do that. But being overly extravagant with money without a bank account to back it up can lead to big challenges later on. If your partner lives beyond their means, and you find it concerning, it might be a sign that their values or goals around money are different from your own. - Using money to shame
Watch out if your partner judges you or makes you feel ashamed for having too little or too much money compared to them. In both cases, your partner is not supportive and understanding of your financial situation, and that’s a red flag. - Excessive debt
A mortgage or student loans are one thing; excessive credit card debt is another. Borrowing money to make ends meet is also a red flag. These are signs that your partner is not fiscally responsible, and this can land you both in hot water down the road. - Keeping secrets or lying about money
The feeling of being financially out of control often leads people to hide aspects of their financial lives. If your partner is in better control, you probably anticipate criticism rather than empathy, and that perception will motivate you to hide the truth both from yourself and your partner. Still, secrets and lies set a dangerous precedent for dishonesty in the relationship, which can drive a wedge between you.
- Refusing to talk about money